For the past few months of Quinn’s life, I have been trying to get her to fall in love with something besides me.

Not that our love should dim in the slightest, but a lovey to cuddle when she wakes in the middle of the night might mean mommy could actually get more than three hours of sleep in a row.  That’s what the experts say, anyway.

I tried numerous soft blanket squares, a hybrid blankey/bear that we called Minty Bear, and a few cuddly little stuffies of a safe size.

But baby was NOT having it. There was once a brief attachment to a small cloth hippo I called Violet. But come darkness, Violet was out on her butt and it was back to mommy.

Then a few weeks ago, Quinn met Frankie, a small plush babydoll with a little blue suit, forever closed eyes, and two short ribbons for hair. Let me tell you, no sooner looked but they became so danged inseparable that Quinn will literally awaken from a deep sleep if Frankie drops from her hand and scream herself awake until I return him to her embrace.

This is a fierce, firm love, and it is one that isn’t exactly helping us to get more sleep. How is this relationship supposed to make things easier?

Frankie is a constant companion these days, including lying between us as we nurse, cuddling with us in the frontpack, and riding along in the carseat where he inevitably, horrifyingly falls out of Q’s grasp and just out of my reach.

He certainly seems to be a comfort in new situations (though not one that supplants mama at night). But now that Quinn has two comfort objects, she seems to have twice the separation anxiety! Somewhere, under a palm tree in the middle of paradise, a sadistic parenting expert is having a good laugh.

A version of this post originally ran on Moms Alive.